ow. Good ow...but ow.

[deadlightsgirl]

Yes, kickboxing broke me. I will go back though, and it will break me less because I will know better how to modify. Not going to happen this week, which stinks because I get the feeling that before this week is out I will be in need of some good punching, but oh well. A thousand blessings on ladyjoust for not only being a wonderful instructor (and strong as hell for someone who always bitches about how out of shape she is) but for being the kind of awesome friend who let me cry on her from the tension release.  I had a lot of fun, and it is a very hard workout and very different from anything else I do, and getting out the RARRRR in a healthy safe way is a good thing (at one point she said to me, "you know, you CAN hold back, you don't have to hit it THAT hard."  I said, but then what's the point?).  Very different from stage combat, though we knew that, but I didn't have the problems I thought I would have with wanting to pull punches, though I found it harder to not pull kicks.  Anyway.  Yes, I'm broken, but I'm happy I went and will go again.  I have a lot of rage to work through, and yoga just ain't getting it done ;).  Was it advisable to go?  Who knows.  I hadn't had much sleep, but I hadn't had any the night before and I got up and went to yoga.  Last week was such a complete washout of anything, I slept so badly for one reason or another that every day after Gracie got on the school bus, I'd have to go back to sleep and the whole day would be wasted with me getting no time to myself.  So this week, I just got stubborn about it.  I'm not feeling vastly better and I am certainly not looking forward to the next 10 days with no school and no breaks apart from my yoga class and my lodge meeting next week, but at least this week I did SOMETHING.  People keep offering these well-intentioned suggestions of ways I could get help, and I smile and thank them for the spirit in which they mean it, but the fact is that this is what it is right now.  I manage best I can with what I got, and what is difficult now won't stay this way forever.

Comments

[ladyjoust.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure if you have any idea how excited I was to have you in class. I know you're attuned to what your body can and can't do, and what it needs, but if you ever need a guiding hand in modifications I'm there for you. Also: you can cry on me any time.

(at one point she said to me, "you know, you CAN hold back, you don't have to hit it THAT hard." I said, but then what's the point?)

Can't even be remotely stern here, since I do the SAME THING when I take class.


As to my abilities? You're very sweet and kind. Oh, and next time I visit I can bring gloves and mitts and we can have some personal training time. :D

[tomincloset.livejournal.com]

Really? Can I train in slow motion while you sing about how you're standing in the way? Or if we hear any inspirational power chords, will we lie down on the floor until they go away?